The Devil's Beatitudes

If the Devil were to write his Beatitudes, they would probably go something like this:

Blessed are those who are too tired, too busy, too distracted to spend an hour once a week with their fellow Christians in Church -- they are my best workers.
Blessed are those Christians who wait to be asked and expect to be thanked -- I can use them.
Blessed are the touchy, with a bit of luck they may stop going to church -- they are my missionaries.
Blessed are those who are very religious but get on everyone's nerves -- they are mine forever.
Blessed are the troublemakers -- they shall be called my children.
Blessed are those who have no time to pray -- they are easy prey for me.
Blessed are the gossiper -- for they are my secret agents.
Blessed are those critical of church leadership -- for they shall inherit a place with me in my fate.
Blessed are the complainers -- I'm all ears for them.
Blessed are you when you read this and think it is about other people and not yourself -- I've got you.

* Author unknown.